I know, I know…the last thing you need is another list of unrealistic couple goals plastered all over social media. All those perfectly curated photos and corny captions can make even the most loved-up duos feel insecure.
Well, fear not, my friends! I’m here to lay out some actually cute and constructive couple goals that go way deeper than matching pajama sets (although those are adorable too). We’re talking the real heart-and-soul stuff that bonds you closer and fortifies your relationship against whatever rocky roads life throws your way.
If you’re seriously committed to leveling up your love game, buckle up and get ready for ten freakishly adorable yet eminently practical goals. I promise zero cheesiness—just solid, certified relationship coach™ advice to leave you both going “awwwww” in the best way possible.
1. Make Each Other Laughing a Top Priority
Was that a fake laugh just now or did you actually fart? All kidding aside, keeping the laughter flowing is utterly vital for any couple’s wellbeing. Study after study proves that couples who regularly crack each other up have stronger emotional intimacy, better communication, and higher overall relationship satisfaction.
Your Goal: Set a standing weekly “laugh date” where you take turns planning an activity designed to have you both in stitches. Could be an improv show, a seriously terrible (but hilarious) movie screening, or even just hanging at a comedy club if you’re feeling old-fashioned.
Struggling to come up with ideas? Easy—just aim for the silliest, most nostalgic thing you can think of from your childhood. Pretty much anything from back then is bound to seem ridiculous now but in a weirdly heartwarming way. Did someone say re-creating those cringey middle school talent shows?
2. Constantly Learn About Each Other
Look, we all know how this goes. You start dating someone, you go through that obsessive honeymoon phase where you devour every single detail about them…and then one day you wake up and realize it’s been literal years since you asked each other anything deeper than “What do you want for dinner?”
This is a total romance-killer, my friends. Letting yourselves become those obnoxious people who just nod mindlessly while the other drones on about spreadsheets or knitting patterns or whatever. TRAGIC!
Your Goal: Take a page from the early dating playbook and start grilling each other on the types of questions that let you discover new layers. Some examples to get you started:
- If you had to pick one album to listen to for the rest of your life, what would it be?
- What’s something you’ve always wanted to learn or get better at?
- If we were to move somewhere totally new, where would your top choice be and why?
- What’s the most meaningful gift you’ve ever received?
Heck, you can even turn it into a game—like taking turns Googling random questions to ask each other over a bottle of wine. Get into those fascinating depths again! This curiosity and open-mindedness is what’ll keep your connection feeling continuously fresh and exciting.
3. Give (and Ask for) Positive Affirmations Daily
When’s the last time you sincerely complimented your partner? Or asked them to do the same for you? If you’re struggling to remember, you’re in desperate need of making this goal a habit.
I’m sure I don’t need to lecture you on the magic of compliments and positive affirmations. That warm, validated feeling of being hyped up for something you’re awesome at…nothing quite like it to make you feel madly appreciated by the love of your life. That reassurance is the shit, folks.
Your Goal: Each morning when you wake up, tell your partner one specific thing you cherish about them before even getting out of bed. Something like:
“Babe, I’m so grateful for how attentive you are to the little things that make me happy.”
“Thank you for being the most amazing cuddler. Your hugs are legitimately the best.”
“You make me crack up with your wild stories like nobody else. You’re one of a kind, hot stuff.”
Then, and this is KEY, ask them to return the favor by giving you a sincere compliment/affirmation too. This habit builds in accountability to make it a true daily routine of radiating appreciation for one another.
Spreading more positivity first thing in the morning practically ensures you’ll both walk out the door on a warm-fuzzy high, ready to slay your respective days. And that matters. Trust me.
4. Stay Deliciously Curious About Each Other’s Passions
Okay, we’ve covered staying curious about one another’s inner emotional worlds…but what about your partner’s geeky obsessions and niche hobbies? No matter how “boring” or weird they might seem to you at first, guarantee there’s some fascinating depths for you to explore there too.
Imagine how loved your game-obsessed boyfriend would feel if you actually learned a bit about Elden Ring’s lore and asked him enthusiastic questions about it. Or how your poetry-writing girlfriend would melt if you dove into analyzing some metaphors and literary devices in her latest work with her.
Your Goal: Whatever their “thing” is, make a point to ask at least one meaty question about it and actively listen each week. At first, maybe you won’t be able to feign more than a polite interest—I get it. But watching them light up while nerding out, seeing that sparkle in their eye as they delve into the nitty-gritty details…you might just become genuinely intrigued once you let yourself get into it.
The payoff? You’re communicating loud and clear that every single facet of who they are matters immensely to you. No person’s passions are too “lame” or niche for you to dive into right alongside them. Now that’s true intimacy.
5. Come Up with a Fun Couple Tradition/Ritual
Hear me out—having little exclusive traditions as a couple is objectively adorable and will give you both an automatic rush of warmth anytime you engage in them. It scratches that primal itch in us for belonging to our own special “tribe” with someone.
Traditions transcend just being routine habits, too. When you layer on creativity, playfulness, and personal meaning, you fuse ritual into something deeper: a shared bonding experience you can always depend on.
Your Goal: With your partner, brainstorm and commit to a couple tradition together. It could be anything from:
- A goofy monthly date night where you dress up in silly costumes or do an over-the-top roleplay
- Special holiday/anniversary rituals unique to you two (like a “romantic Christmas” where you go all-out with cheesy decorations and wear ugly sweaters while sipping hot toddies)
- A yearly staycation or camping trip where you try to make things feel novel and adventurous
- Weekly cooking experiments where you take turns picking an insanely intricate, far-out recipe to make together
Get creative here! The weirder and sillier yet more personal to you both, the better.
6. Write Love Notes (and Hide Them Sneakily)
I’m sure you’ve heard this one a million times, and you might think it’s too sappy or just not your style. But trust your friendly neighborhood relationship coach on this one—leaving your partner heartfelt love notes is an easy, free, low-effort romantic gesture that keeps the sparks hot as hell.
There’s just something so damn swoon-worthy about stumbling upon a handwritten message where your lover pours their heart out about how amazing you are. Getting that spontaneous flood of feels, no matter how seemingly insignificant the note might be…it’s the direct line to keeping those gooey, nauseating honeymoon vibes on a permanent loop.
Your goal: Stock up on some cute stationery or sticky notes and make it a habit to randomly pen a few sultry, sincere sentences about what you adore about your partner—could be physical attributes, personality traits, fond memories, whatever’s on your mind.
Then discreetly stick those notes EVERYWHERE for your S.O. to find: in their jacket pockets, in their work bag, on their nightstand, on the bathroom mirror, tucked into their shoe. Nothing beats that cheesy giddiness of discovering a sexy lil love note when you least expect it!
7. Stay Physically Intimate (Without the Sex)
Okay, I know that title was definitely a letdown for some of you horndogs out there. But keeping that physical intimacy crackling extends way beyond just randy bedroom romps. I’m talking about casual, non-sexual affection here—the warm hugs, hand-holding, cuddling, and gentle caresses that trigger your happy hormones just as much as the spiciest of activities.
You’d think this kind of innocent physical touch would be a given in any loving relationship, but the sad truth is it often falls by the wayside as couples get complacent over time. We just start assuming we’re “too busy” or let our obsession with personal space kill off all those little intimacies.
Your Goal: Make a concerted effort to keep introducing more casual, affectionate physical touch into your everyday interactions. Some ideas:
- Initiate a lingering hug for at least 20 seconds every time one of you gets home
- While watching TV, take turns laying your head in the other’s lap so they can stroke your hair
- Sit extra close, thigh-to-thigh, when dining out so you can feel that warmth between you
- Give each other shoulder massages while talking about your days
- Sleep naked and make naked cuddling a nightly ritual (sex not necessarily required…or maybe it will be!)
Getting hands-on frequently without it always escalating to sex keeps that blissful skin hunger satisfied in a more tender way. But who knows, all that sensual yet no-pressure intimacy just might lead to bedroom fun too…
8. Reminisce Together Weekly
Think back to all the mushy, gushy first-date stories you’ve heard from your longest-married friends or relatives. They pretty much always light up and chuckle fondly as they recount all the madcap exploits and meet-cutes from their whirlwind honeymoon phase, don’t they? You can feel those rosy memories strengthening the bond between them even now.
That’s the true power of reminiscing—transporting you both back to those starry-eyed butterflies and reigniting that magic. So many of us get so hyperfocused on constantly chasing the future that we forget to cherish the delicious yesterdays that brought us here.
Your Goal: Once a week, set aside at least an hour for a “Remember When…” walk down memory lane together. Take turns recounting your favorite moments, surprises, and turning points from the earliest days of your relationship.
Did you have any adorably disastrous early date mishaps you laughed off? What about zingers from flirtatious banter you’ll never forget? Or maybe some quietly profound conversation from a late-night road trip that low-key changed everything?
Break out any old photos, ticket stubs, playlists, whatever mementos can help vividly revisit those early sparks. And don’t just reminisce separately—luxuriate in the memories together and let one recollection ignite more tales until you’ve formed an intricate web of nostalgia celebrating your unique love story.
9. Get Disgustingly Nerdy Together
Hey, you love who you love—weird quirks, geeky obsessions, and all, am I right? So lean allll the way into fangirling over your shared favorite shows, books, games, bands—you name it—without any shame or inhibition. That’s the stuff that bonds soulmates!
Your Goal: First, decide which of your mutually beloved nerdy fixations you’re going to absolutely commit to exploring on a new level together, no holding back. Could be:
- Re-reading/re-watching/re-playing through your favorite book/movie/video game series and dissecting every last incredible detail
- Attending every single convention, exhibition, and meetup related to that fixation and going full cosplay
- Starting a ridiculous fan club or Twitch stream/YouTube channel where you review and analyze new related content
- Taking up hobbies or crafting projects inspired by your beloved nerdy property (fan art, fanfiction, replicas, you nerdy freaks!)
Whatever your self-indulgent jam is, just go ahead and plan to reach obscene, cringeworthy levels of obsession—no holding back or filter required. You’ve found your co-conspirator, your partner-in-nerdgasmic-crime…now relish in going full cringe-mode with zero apologies!
This vulnerability and trust to embrace your utter dork-brain is a powerful love language. When your quirks and passions are celebrated instead of mocked or dismissed—by the most important person in your life no less—it opens up sacred intimacy chambers you never knew existed.
10. Learn to Argue Properly
Conflict is inevitable for even the most sickly sweet, perpetually horny-for-each-other lovebirds. You’re two fleshed-out humans with contrasting opinions, backgrounds, and quirks—disagreements are simply part of the package deal.
But we’ve all seen the toxic, vicious argument cycles that doom so many couples. The shouting, name-calling, eye-rolling, and bringing up ancient grudges every time…ugh. That corrosive hostility is poison for any relationship.
Your Goal: Learn to argue with maturity and mutual care instead of childish volatility. Some ground rules to commit to upholding:
- If one person is heated, the other stays calm. Take a breather if needed—NEVER escalate emotions when one of you is already maxed out.
- No name-calling, mocking tones, eye-rolling, or antagonizing whatsoever. Keep things centered on the practical disagreement itself.
- Make “I feel…” statements instead of accusatory “You always…” language. Ditto for using “We” wherever possible rather than divisive pronouns.
- Master the art of active listening. Repeat back key points to confirm understanding and make requests, not demands (i.e. “Could you please…” vs “You need to…”).
- End every dispute with sincere physical affirmation—a hug, forehead touch, or even just hand-holding as you summarize your goal of resolving things as partners.
Getting skilled at these moves lets you two fight fairly—venting grievances thoughtfully instead of inflicting damage. Little by little, any argument stymieing becomes just another chance to exercise trust, respect, and recommitting to the team mentality of your relationship.
Phew! There you have it, lovebirds—ten downright sickeningly cute yet sincerely constructive goals to keep that spark blazing for the long haul. Go forth and make your coupled-up lives even more swoon-worthy! Just don’t go overboard on the PDA around me, mmmkay?
