Well, well, well, what do we have here? Another juicy topic to sink our teeth into!
Listen up, folks, because today we’re talking about the types of men who marry their mistresses. Yep, you read that right. We’re diving deep into the psyche of these guys who think it’s totally cool to have their cake and eat it too.
Now, I know what you might be thinking. “But Sarah, isn’t marrying your mistress a bit…I don’t know…sleazy?” And you’re not wrong. It’s definitely not winning any awards for moral high ground.
But here’s the thing – it happens. More often than you might think. And as a relationship coach, I’ve seen it all. The good, the bad, and the downright ugly.
We’re going to take a closer look at the different types of men who marry their mistresses.
The “I Can Have My Cake and Eat It Too” Guy
This charmer thinks he’s slick enough to juggle a wife AND a mistress. He’s got his wife at home, taking care of the kids and keeping up appearances, while he’s off gallivanting with his mistress on the side.
But eventually, the lies catch up with him. He realizes he can’t keep up the charade forever. So what does he do? He decides to upgrade his mistress to wifey status!
He thinks he’s getting the best of both worlds – the stability of marriage with the excitement of a new relationship. But let’s be real, he’s just trading one set of problems for another.
The “My Wife Just Doesn’t Understand Me” Dude
This poor, misunderstood soul feels like his wife just doesn’t “get” him anymore. She’s too busy with her own life, her own career, her own interests. She doesn’t appreciate his genius, his passion, his…ego.
Enter the mistress. She’s young, she’s fun, and most importantly, she thinks he’s the greatest thing since sliced bread. She hangs on his every word, laughs at all his jokes, and makes him feel like the king of the world.
So naturally, he decides to ditch his wife and run off into the sunset with his mistress. Because who needs a partner when you can have a full-time admirer?
The “Midlife Crisis” Man
Ah, the classic midlife crisis. He wakes up one day and realizes he’s not as young as he used to be. His hairline is receding, his belly is growing, and his glory days are behind him.
But then he meets his mistress. She’s everything his wife isn’t – young, spontaneous, and up for anything. She makes him feel alive again, like he’s still got it.
So he decides to trade in his comfortable, stable life for a shiny new model. He leaves his wife, his kids, his whole world behind, all for the thrill of starting over with his mistress.
But here’s the thing – a new relationship doesn’t magically erase your problems. And when the novelty wears off, he’s left with the same insecurities and doubts, just with a different woman by his side.
The “I’m a Changed Man” Myth
This guy swears he’s a new man. He’s seen the error of his ways, he’s ready to leave his cheating past behind and start fresh with his mistress.
He tells her that his marriage was a mistake, that he never really loved his wife, that she’s the only one for him. He promises her the world, if only she’ll be his wife.
But here’s the thing – a leopard doesn’t change its spots. A man who cheats on his wife is a man who’s capable of cheating, period. And if he’s willing to leave his wife for his mistress, who’s to say he won’t leave his new wife for the next shiny thing that catches his eye?
The “We’re Soulmates” Sap
This hopeless romantic believes he’s found his soulmate in his mistress. They have an undeniable connection, a once-in-a-lifetime love that just can’t be denied.
He’s convinced that fate brought them together, that they were meant to be. Never mind the fact that he’s already married – this is true love we’re talking about!
So he blows up his life, leaves his wife, and rides off into the sunset with his mistress, convinced they’ll live happily ever after.
But soulmates aren’t found, they’re made. And a relationship born out of lies and betrayal isn’t exactly the stuff fairy tales are made of.
The “I’m Just Not Happy” Husband
This guy has everything – a beautiful wife, a nice house, a good job. But he’s just not…happy.
He feels like something is missing, like there must be more to life than this. And then he meets his mistress, and suddenly everything feels exciting and new again.
He convinces himself that his unhappiness is his wife’s fault, that he deserves to be with someone who makes him feel alive. So he leaves her for his mistress, chasing that elusive happiness.
But here’s the thing – happiness isn’t something you find in another person. It’s something you create within yourself. And if you’re not happy on your own, no relationship in the world can fix that.
The “It Just Happened” Fool
This guy never meant to fall in love with his mistress. It just…happened. One minute they were just friends, the next they were in a full-blown affair.
He knows it’s wrong, he knows he should end it, but he just can’t seem to help himself. He’s in too deep, and before he knows it, he’s leaving his wife and marrying his mistress.
But “it just happened” is a cop-out. Cheating is a choice, not an accident. And if he’s willing to “accidentally” fall in love with someone else while he’s married, what’s to stop it from happening again?
The “She Trapped Me” Victim
This poor sap swears he never meant to marry his mistress. She trapped him, you see. She got pregnant, or she threatened to tell his wife, or she just wouldn’t take no for an answer.
He had no choice but to leave his wife and marry her, even though he didn’t really want to. He’s the real victim here, don’t you see?
But let’s be real – unless she literally put a gun to his head, he had a choice. And he chose to betray his wife, to break his vows, and to start a new life with his mistress. That’s on him, not her.
The “Love Conquers All” Idiot
This guy truly believes that his love for his mistress is enough to overcome any obstacle. Sure, he’s married, but that’s just a technicality. His true love is his mistress, and nothing can stand in the way of that.
He’s convinced that once he marries her, everything will fall into place. His wife will understand, his kids will adjust, and he’ll finally have the life he’s always wanted.
But love doesn’t conquer all – especially not the kind of love that’s built on a foundation of lies and betrayal. And the fallout from a messy divorce and a new marriage is never as simple as he thinks it will be.
The “I Deserve to Be Happy” Jerk
This selfish jerk truly believes that his happiness is the only thing that matters. Never mind his wife’s feelings, never mind the promises he made – if he’s not happy, then something has to change.
And if that something is trading in his wife for a younger, hotter mistress? So be it. He deserves to be happy, damn it, and he’s not going to let a little thing like a marriage vow stand in his way.
But here’s the thing – happiness isn’t something you find at the expense of others. And a man who’s willing to destroy his family for his own selfish desires is a man who will never truly be happy, no matter who he’s with.
So What’s the Moral of the Story?
Listen, I’m not here to judge. Relationships are complicated, and sometimes people make mistakes. But if you’re thinking about marrying your mistress, I urge you to think long and hard about what you’re doing.
Are you really ready to blow up your life for someone you’ve been sneaking around with? Are you prepared for the fallout, the heartbreak, the regret?
And even if you are – is it really fair to your mistress? To make her the other woman, to put her in the position of always being second best?
Because here’s the thing – a relationship built on lies and betrayal is never going to be a healthy one. And a man who’s willing to cheat on his wife is a man who’s capable of cheating, period.
So before you go putting a ring on your mistress’s finger, ask yourself – is this really the kind of love you want? The kind that’s born out of deceit and pain?
Or do you want something real, something honest, something that you can be proud of?
The choice is yours, my friend. But choose wisely – because you’ll have to live with the consequences for the rest of your life.
And that’s the tea on men who marry their mistresses. Messy, complicated, and never as simple as they seem.
But hey, what do I know? I’m just a relationship coach with a blog. You do you, boo. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.